Memoirs Of A Science Student...

XIIA. Legends Are Made Here...

XIA and XIIA will always remain special to me. Not for the math or the physics that we were taught but for everything else that transpired behind the doors of that hallowed classroom.

The fact that we had ‘Bewra’ who was always drunk! 

KC and group, need WE say more? Up Franco, Tanumoy, Aman, and the man, Subhajit!

Mr. Raghunath who got an ink stain from “the physics lab”

Me to Mr. Raghunath: “Sir I don’t follow. Explain."

Mr. Raghunath: "Come here and look and the tree."

Me: "Sir, White Flowers?"

Mr. Raghunath: "yes, now you know the answer go back!"

*Mr. Sumit walks into class with pre board papers.*

Me: "Sir, Have I passed finally?"

Mr. Sumit: "I’ll tell you soon. Sit."

Me:"No sir. NOW!"

Mr. Sumit: "You passed"

Me: "Finally..."

Mrs. Dhar (To Aamir and Me):  "Welcome to class. Staying for long?"

Mrs. Dhar: "Class revision. Pick any topic from the book I’ll give you a question"

(The usual statics, electricity, heat and gyan comes out)

Mrs. Dhar: "Victor your turn to pick."

Me: "Ma’am, logic gates"

Soham (After 5 seconds):" Hahahaha"

Class: "Sir, why do you crack PJ’s?"

Mr. Sanchayan: "I crack Pj’s because I can’t afford Rj’s"

Mr. Sanchayan (Exasperatedly to the class):  "How much more time till the period ends?"

Mr. Banerjee: "Every religion has a dark side."

Overheard: "Ours is the church!"

Mrs. "Shaw: Victor and Francisco, kitaab laya?"

Us: "No ma’am."

Mrs. Shaw: "Very good!"

*So Arka was scratching his hairy legs in class. and Mrs. Chatterjee sees him*

Mrs. Chatterjee: "What are you DOING??"

Arka: “Ma’am scratching.”

Rhythm goes to the library before Bosco Fest to bunk class! Mrs. Acharyya (Who happens to teach the commerce section) scolds him!

Arka happened to bunk as well. He walks up to her

Arka: “Ma'am. I have a debating audition to go to”and Walks out scot free."

Random People: "What did you just say Ale?"

Ale: “Ehhhhhhh. Bhuley gechi.”

Anna (At the canteen seeing Debarpan, Arka or Me): “Gerabee? Gerabee?”

Soham:”I was taeling...."

”Mr. Sumit (To Arka): “Yeah what's going on there?”

Me: “Sir he's gay!”

Mr. Sumit (To Arka): “Yeah, then come over here."

”Mrs. Dhar: “If you are not busy you are dizzy!"

”Science exhibition *our project FAIL*

Arka: “Dara. Shombhu chemical pump shikhiye chilo.”

Debarpan: "Tai lagabo.”

Me: What?

Debarpan:  “Shombhu class six-e chemical pump shikhiyechilo, retard.”

*At the Science Exhibition*

Siddhant Kanaujia spews out loads of scientific shit about how his project is a non-Newtonian fluid.

*Debarpan glares*

Siddhant: “Actually it’s all crap. It’s just water and cornflour.”

Soham: “Victor! Khabar achey?”

(He was holding my empty tiffin box)

*So we were playing football in class. Mr. Bhual is seen in the corridor*

Vivek: “Bhual aasche”

(Class settles down)

Mr. Bhual (Enters the class and approaches Vivek): “Vivek, vernacular-ey kotha bolish na.”

Alekhya (To almost anything): “This fat, this long.”

There’s a long line of people in the canteen. “Anna roll, Anna chow”

.Debarpan and Me (Daily): Pick up rolls and chow without telling Anna.

Debarpan (To everything): “Kelabo toke...”

So the class is sitting quietly with no noise being made. And suddenly in a loud voice: “CHICKEN!”

*Every week before chemistry practical*

Random person: "Labcoat? labcoat?Jonathan Da Labcoat?"

Jonathan: "This is not a shop!"

Karen (To Jonathan): "You and Jaya keep the lab files so untidily. Look at me and “hole-hole” how neat our lab is!"

*Before ISC Chemistry practical exams began*

Jonathan: *mumbles answers and leaves*

During the Computer Practical 1st term exam the LAN was on and programs were emailed to one another.

During the 2nd term, the LAN was put off, and out came the pen drives.

Technology rules...

*Arka was poking wire into Tanumoy's butt*

Karen: "While you're doing your experiment, he's doing his experiments!"

*Kirit was showing us his page long general remark which faded towards the end*

"Kirit: Cicely's pen ran out in the middle of writing it."

Darpan (slapping someone’s head): "Idiot!"

*And then he finishes a math problem we've been staring at all period in 2 minutes.*

SJV: “I won't tell you where to get pornography. You know that better than I do.”

SJV: “So, last week we were Doing women...”


*Okay, so we were having yet another 'Value Education' class in school*
SJV: Let me tell you a story about three young men who left home for the first time. On the train they were exclaiming: Beef khaben, Modh khaben, Cigarette khaben!"

Mrs. Jayaraman: "I hear a phone ringing! Where izz Zambo Biznu??"

Class: "Ma'am, he's absent!"

In the chemistry lab, Mrs. Jayaraman: "Kaustav Saha and Zambo Biznu, stop talking and do your work."

Class: Ma'am, they BOTH are absent!

Mr. Raghunath: “Hot man?"

Okay so we were waiting in class for our EVE projects.

Shovic's elbow touches his phone and it plays some lame Bollywood song.

Mrs. Chatterjee is alarmed and cries out “What is that?”

Shovic: “ONE TOUCH WIRELESS FM”

And he was suspended!

But he still gets a text out to his girlfriend from Kirit’s phone!

Mr. Raghunath kept talking crap in class one day.

Class: “Sir, Power shoe?”

Mr. Raghunath: “Power shoo!”

If you ever wanted to see a Chicken fight with a chair, Chicky vs Snehajyoti was a sight to marvel at!

Alekhya:  "Don't talk behind my back!!!"

Pravjyot: "But I’m not sitting behind you.."

JP: You boys are here in this world "DUE TO THE BEAUTIFUL UNION OF TWO HUMAN BEINGS"

(Pauses)

 And then adds, "I suppose so"

Pravjyot: "I don't watch porn, I do porn."

There was a ruckus in the computer lab and someone sees SJV walking into the corridor.

He starts shouting "SIBY SIBY SIBY "

SJV hears the voice and comes into the lab screaming “who was shouting Siby Siby SIby? When your dad comes, do you’ll shout “MUKUL MUKUL MUKUL?”

So one day, Chorbi, Pravjyot and Shovic are checking out *ahem* hot moms.

And then spot one, and Chorbi goes, "MILF!! MILF!!" and Shovic joins him.

Two minutes later, they ask Pravjyot if he knows the full form of MILF.

Pravjyot: "Yeah...duh..."

Shovic: "Ki bol toh"

Pravjyot: "My Friends Hot Mom, simple!!"

Mrs. Dhar (to Chorbi): you should use the golf gardens bus instead of public buses. There are lots of trees there which you can use them to show your friendship to girls. I've lived there for 20 years, and have seen many people!!

Darpan (Not knowing how loud he would be): "Have you used it?"

Sampras: "Amay ragash na! Ami Mahabharat korey phelbo!"

Unknown: “Keliye RADIOACTIVE kore debo!!”

Let me recall an event when Sannidhya was explaining Fraunhoffer's lines as directed by Mr. Raghunath.

Here's how Sunny began:Sunny: "Well... the sun consists of many elements, hydrogen, helium, sodium, potassium, THOLLIUM...etc"

Sunny and Francisco (before every exam): “CHUDE CHOMOTKAR!”

Subhajit: Aamar ma ke keno chudbi barra? Baari te maa bon nei?

Mendes: Tui Aamar ma ke keno chudbi bol toh?

Subhajit: Maa bon nei na, maha mushkil.

Mrs. Jayaraman: “Tomorrow is a Chemistry test.”

Subhajit: "Ma'am you’re a liar."

Mrs. Kutar: "What role do trees play in our life? "

*Subhajit shoots his hand up in the air.*

Mrs. Kutar: “Yes”

Subhajit:"Ma'am, an 'important' role."

Mrs. Kutar: "What is GOI?"

Subhajit: "It is 'goi.'"

During the Bengali class, Tanumoy was asked to read the text.

The text had a character called "Maggi."

He purposely mispronounces it as "Maagi."

*The whole class looks at him shocked. Arka, sitting in the first bench, looked at him like he just saw him drop dead.*

The best part was the teachers answer:  "Erom hotei paare."

Mr. Sanchayan: “Wait one minute then hit him. The bell will have rung by then.”

At the time we were having a lot of chaos with students bringing mobile phones to school.

So, Francisco, takes his keys, and under the table starts fiddling with it and starts acting all suspicious.

Mrs. Lingwood sees that, and comes running and asks him to turn out his pockets, which he promptly does, and ma'am only finds his keys.

She leaves utterly disappointed.

After that incident, Francisco puts a sign on his bag saying, "Cell phone here" on one compartment.

Mr. Chattoraj checks his bag, sees the sign and CHECKS ONLY THAT COMPARTMENT in a bag with over four other compartments!

*Vivek was attempting a bicycle kick.*

General statement: "There, he goes down!"

This isn’t 12A but Rajarshi was in the computer lab, watching funny football videos...

*Sir comes running and quietly stands behind him. *

*Rajarshi is in fits of laughter.*

*Sir quietly taps Rajarshi on his shoulder.*

Rajarshi, without looking back, says, "Dara na baara"

Mr. Raghunath:  “What men? …….My dear boys…… u belib me, all of u know physics” (He tried to say man but failed miserably)

Soham (on seeing Ayush complete the physics sums): “e ki re ami copy-i  korte parlam naa arr o beta hesh-o kore fello”

Rhythm (before entering the exam hall on the day of physics test):” Sunny, I need to pass man, please”

Saucy (before any test): “Bhai, don’t take stress and strain, Young’s modulus nikal jayega”

Francisco (before the second term exams in class XI):” Do you know the physics syllabus?”

Subhajit:“Amar naa kalke buke khub chest pain hochchilo”

Ayush (whenever he heard someone singing): “gana bandh kar yaar”

Sannidhya’s father (Science Exhibition Judge): What’s your name?

*silence for 3 seconds*

Sanni: Sir, My name is Sannidhya!!! I mean Sannidhya Kumar Ghosh.

Sanni (explaining the experiment): Sir according to the recent survey under taken by us.....

Judge: Ok Wait!!

*Aman  Immediately starts explaining the uses of our project though a slide show.*

Judge (to Aman): Wait! Explain me the circuit diagram to me

*SILENCE FOR 3 MINUTES*

Aman: Sir, these are wires, these are switches and there is a cell!

Judge: I mean the working of the circuit!

*SILENCE*

Aman : “Sir, I was given the responsibility of making the presentation and nothing more!"

Mustafa (making an announcement in class): "Guys I need to collect "money" for ....."

*A shoe is thrown at him by Tanumoy Majumder*

So Francisco had his shoes off in class one day.

Next thing he remembered, one shoe was in Srijan's guitar case, the other in the teacher's cupboard!

 "XIIA Forever"

Inputs by: Arka, Alekhya, Franco, Sannidhya, Archismaan, Kirit, Shambo, Aman, Chorbi, Shovic, Subhajit, Tanumoy, Soumyajit, Avik, Mustafa

Video Credit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfuzVU94vI4