Do Athletes Deserve The Salaries They Make?

Alex Rodriguez

It is common human behaviour to want more. More money, more amenities, we all want more of everything. That is human nature, but not all of us are equally fortunate. Some of us get paid enormous amounts of money for little or no work while many others (in fact a huge majority of people) have to work very hard to earn their keep. This I can illustrate by a simple example. Alex Rodriguez is a thirty-six year old man of Hispanic descent who was born in New York but grew up in Miami. He entered the workforce directly out of high school. He currently has a job in New York City and has been living a comfortable life since the young age of eighteen. ^[1] What is his profession? He plays baseball. A majority of people from Rodriguez’s background have to struggle to make ends meet while Mr. Rodriguez is pocketing close to $27,500,000 per year, a figure that some of us can only dream about. Why the disparity? That is the question!

            Athletes have a number of reasons why they earn such large amounts of money. In today’s financially struggling world, people tend to lose their jobs and their livelihoods very easily. Ordinary middle class people might have to work for close to forty hours a week, mostly sitting behind a desk filing through stacks of paperwork and pocket something in the region of $50,000 to $100,000 a year I would say. People are paid for the value of the work they put in. There is huge demand for sports as a pastime so athletes are values very highly by a larger audience. However, such a statement often leads to a rather thought provoking follow up: With education such a vital field in today’s world, why do teachers get paid poorly? It’s quite an interesting question to put forth!

            The supply of athletes is very rare. The supply of outstanding professional athletes is still rarer. It is basic economic knowledge that when the supply of one commodity is very limited, the price for that commodity will be very high. Teachers are available in abundance; this is one of the main reasons why they get paid a lesser salary compared to a professional athlete. Of course this will lead to the argument regarding emergency workers – policemen, paramedics and firemen. Do they deserve a higher salary because of the nature of their work? Firemen and policemen are exposed to a huge number of risks each time they go out on call, while paramedics help save lives. Yet the average firefighter in America earns around $40,000 to $60,000 a year. ^[2]

            A professional athlete’s life is not just a bed of roses. It has its own thorns too. Young athletes hoping to make it to the big leagues sacrifice a lot of their teenage years training and preparing themselves for a disciplined life. They often tend to put in hours of hard work and sacrifice each day, something that ordinary people might not do on a daily basis. Injury is another demon. An athlete could suffer a career ending injury which could force them out of the game for good. Former Washington Redskins quarterback Joe Theismann’s injury comes to mind. ^[3] An athlete could also suffer an injury that might heal but cause a massive dip in form. The case of Canadian born English soccer player Owen Hargreaves immediately comes to my mind. ^[4] Some athletes have even lost their life as a result of a horrific incident during a sporting event. Italian MotoGP racer Marco Simoncelli, who was killed a month ago in Malaysia when he lost control of his motorcycle, is an example. The recent Lokomotiv Yaroslavl plane crash which killed an entire team is another example. ^[5][6] There exists this high risk factor amongst most athletes. Economic policy usually indicates that a high risk means a high reward as well. This leads to athletes demanding such a high salary. In the case of Alex Rodriguez or LeBron James who were drafted right out of high school, a career ending injury could completely ruin them. Tiger Woods also comes to mind for different reasons. It wasn’t an injury of any sort that ruined his glowing reputation. It was a car accident and numerous allegations of marital infidelities that caused his downfall. A UC Davis study says that the Tiger Woods scandal cost shareholders of companies like Nike and Gatorade close to $12 billion. ^[7] This scandal cost us everyday citizens a lot of money but because of the ‘Tiger Woods’ brand name he amassed huge amount of money for himself, so technically he can still live a comfortable life with no real worry.

LeBron James

            Athletes are ‘skilled labourers’. As absurd as this may sound it’s true. There is only one LeBron James, one Peyton Manning and one Albert Pujols. The demand for such athletes is so high that their prices escalate to astronomical figures. There might be other youngsters who aspire to make it big in the professional leagues at some point in their lives but chances that they will be better than the best is rare. Hockey is still looking for the next Wayne Gretzky. A high paying salary does not guarantee success in a sport. This adds to the risk element I was talking about earlier. Team owners and officials put a lot of trust into big name players and pay them large amounts of money. However, the nature of sporting events does not guarantee their success each year. English soccer club Manchester City have spent millions of pounds in the last few years and have only managed to win one trophy, the FA Cup in 2011; their first trophy since 1976. ^[8] They have just announced a record £197 million loss, the biggest loss in English Soccer History. ^[9] Money can’t buy happiness and neither can it guarantee success.

Jokes Apart: We'll see money like this soon if it continues...

            I’m sure there are people who believe that being excessively skilled in a particular sport is not a good characteristic. Yet, it could be these very people who pay large sums of money to go and watch their heroes in action or spend even larger sums of money to dress the way their favourite athletes dress. Believe it or not, even a simple action like buying a ‘Maple Leafs’ or a ‘Blue Jays’ jersey contributes money to the coffers of the sporting franchise and a large sum of this money is often used to pay the high salaries of the players. Even watching the team play on television, sitting in the comfort of your living room with a glass of pop in one hand and a bowl of popcorn, contributes money to professional teams albeit in smaller amounts. Sporting franchises often sign huge television and radio deals with major sports broadcasting companies that bring in a lot of revenue to the sports teams. Much of this money is again used to pay salaries, so indirectly we pay athletes salaries too. Personally, I feel an athlete is entitled to earn as much they can provided they earn it legally. I love to play soccer and even though I always dreamt of playing professional soccer, I know I will never be able to make it to the level of goalkeepers like Peter Schmeichel, Oliver Kahn and Lev Yashin. ^[10][11][12] This is why they were professional athletes and I will never be one. They had the skills to make it big, which means that they were entitled to high paying salaries as a result. If as citizens we are against the high salaries of athletes citing them as a “ridiculous waste of money” the only suggestion I can come up with is for those individuals to completely boycott sports teams. This would include complete and total boycott of watching sports teams play and buying sporting merchandise. This is the only way I can see sports franchises and athletes losing a part of their revenue. ^[13]

Fire Fighters: Deserving a higher pay?

            As I mentioned earlier, it is often thought that noble professions like fire fighters, policemen, doctor’s even soldiers deserve more money than a rookie professional athlete who is just starting his career. The answer to this claim is the same: there is a larger demand for emergency workers compared to the demand for outstanding professional athletes. Because of the lower demand for noble professionals (in most areas of the world) they get paid less compared to professional athletes. This is completely fair in my opinion as every profession is unique in its own way. It is due to the rare supply of good athletes that a renowned doctor might earn $35,000 a year while a rookie sportsman might earn $250,000 a year. Every athlete is also aware of the fact that they are unique. If one franchise is unwilling to pay their demands (except in the case where it is outrageous) they know that someone else in the global market will be willing to meet their demands.

            In connection with the ‘Tiger Woods’ brand that I mentioned earlier, another way athletes can earn huge amounts of money is via their own brand name. The ‘Air Jordan’ range belonging to NBA superstar Michael Jordan is another classic example. Michael Jordan reportedly earned $40 million a year from endorsements alone. ^[14] It wasn’t Michael Jordan’s basketball skills alone that earned him huge sums of money; it was his economic potential that brought him a lot of wealth too. This merely proves the fact that fame sells, and sells big. Some people might call this outrageous, but Jordan was able to earn most of his money through his brand name and there isn’t much that any of us can do about it. David Beckham is another huge global name in world sport. He reportedly earns $40 million a year even though he is in the twilight of his career. ^[15]

Mr. Basketball Himself...

To summarize, I feel that most people will always be divided in their opinion whether or not athletes deserve such high salaries for the little work they do. Pros and cons to such an economic question will always exist. It is my personal opinion that an athlete is justified to earn as much as he or she can legally because it is their right to do so. Critics will always exist no matter where we go. It is basic economic principles that lead us to debate over this issue. In short, since the supply of outstanding professional athletes is very low and demand is high, their salaries tend to go up astronomically. Athletes endure huge sacrifices and take a lot of risks as well: such actions will cause their salaries to only go up higher. After all, ABBA puts it so eloquently:

“Money, money, money

Must be funny

In the rich man's world.”

References:

[1] Why Do Athletes Make So Much Money? (http://mcamp.hubpages.com/hub/athletesalaries)

MCamp, HubPages

[2] Do Professional Athletes Deserve Multi-Million Dollar Salaries? (http://wg.serpmedia.org/pdf_2ATE/WB2ATE_individual_units/full_color/WG2ATE_Part4.pdf)

Strategic Education Research Partnership 2010

[3] The Hit That Changed a Career

(http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/11/17/AR2005111701635.html)

Shapiro, Leonard, Washington Post Staff Writer. November 18^th 2005 

[4] Anxiety affected Owen Hargreaves - Sir Alex Ferguson. (http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/teams/m/man_utd/9163714.stm )

 BBC Sport, 7^th November 2010

[5] Marco Simoncelli's death was unpreventable, says MotoGP's safety officer. (http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2011/oct/24/marco-simoncelli-death-motogp-tributes)

 Weaver, Paul. The Guardian UK. October 24^th 2011

[6] Top KHL squad killed in passenger plane crash in Russia.

(https://rt.com/news/passenger-plane-russia-reports-005/#)

RT (erstwhile Russia Today). September 7^th 2011.

[7] University Of California Davis: Graduate School of Management. (http://www.businesswire.com/portal/site/home/permalink/?ndmViewId=news_view&newsId=20091228005221&newsLang=en) December 28^th 2009

[8] FA Cup final: Manchester City 1 Stoke City 0 Match Report. (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/competitions/fa-cup/8514022/FA-Cup-final-Manchester-City-1-Stoke-City-0-match-report.html)

White, Duncan. The Daily Telegraph, May 14^th, 2011

 

[9] Manchester City announce biggest ever loss in English football. (http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/nov/18/manchester-city-biggest-ever-loss)

Conn, David. The Guardian UK. November 18^th, 2011

 

[10] Peter Schmeichel.

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Schmeichel)

Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[11] Oliver Kahn.

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oliver_Kahn)

Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[12] Lev Yashin.

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lev_Yashin)

Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[13] The Coming Revenue Revolution in Sports

(http://www.willamette.edu/wucl/pdf/review/42-4/williams.pdf)

Williams, Jack F.

[14] A Multiple Product Endorser can be a Credible Source. (http://fulltext.ausport.gov.au/fulltext/1999/cjsm/v3n1/redenbach31.htm)

Redenbach, Andrew. Cyber-Journal of Sport Marketing, February 2, 2009

[15] The World's Highest-Paid Soccer Players. (http://www.forbes.com/sites/kurtbadenhausen/2011/04/20/the-worlds-highest-paid-soccer-players/) Badenhausen, Kurt. Forbes, April 20^th, 2011

Photo Credit:
Alex Rodriguez: http://jimssports.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/5111506200514821.jpg
LeBron James: https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE22VtJH20VXoz_SSG61kxdYKfNCHvDo-EAE_aGVNr2lGc5BzxCpU1nmUU_RW1XUn9w1wDAmT2k5492F3vFouyrMAzqeaSwEEgpUZDcq1hNpWB68j5qSj-OlTs2bd2SZd61MKHxNUod8Y/s1600/highest_paid_athletes_11.jpg
Man City Money: http://www.sabotagetimes.com/wp-content/uploads/sheikh-mansour_1217186c.jpeg
Firefighters:https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfoKKjQoQqnCTcSYOZuslfjTTWUiMB7Y6u-b1GIDaRmVAQmSw5nnFuCxjFeXUPbyOxYRRFWC7_N09LC5R9w17B504Ktiys6C3Sx-Oug72yhzKIvq0Cnh7cqID-xMTo-ekaee3bQ5fclI5K/
Michael Jordan: http://thebestten.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/michael-jordan-xx3.jpg

Note: This piece was part of my economics term paper, which fetched me a grade on 83%. Feedback and comment are appreciated as always. I've only been studying economics for three months now and it isn't going to be by major in future either.
Also, excuse the faulty spacing of the references. For some reason I can't seen to fix it properly...

A Calcutta Boy...

The City Of Joy.

I’m nineteen years old now and that might come as a surprise to you! Where have nineteen years gone by so quickly? It seems like yesterday that I entered school for the first time and today I sit on my bed, in far away Canada and look back at the times that were. I can safely say that it was a fabulous ride.

It’s kind of funny when people ask me my background. I’ll tell you why. It’s because its so vast and varied that’s its actually quite hard to pin point exactly. Like this one time I had to do a project (for Computers believe it or not) on my family tree. All the time that I spent researching, I learnt some pretty unique facts about my ancestors and those before them. To call a spade a spade, I can tell you that I was born in the best place in the world and grew up in another equally great place: Goa, India and Calcutta, India.

Deep down, I will always consider myself to be a Goan. What about my best friends? They’re both Goan nuts too.  Together I’m sure the trio of us could run riot in a lot of different ways but that’s beside the point. Today, I look back and see how much of “Calcutta Boy” I am. Like I mentioned, I have no roots there whatsoever, I just happened to grow up there. Today as I pursue a college degree twelve thousand kilometres away, I can look back at everything that transpired back home In India.

I loved Goa, I will always love Goa. Don’t get me wrong there, but when it comes to the sight and sounds of childhood, it’s always Calcutta that comes into my mind. The puja’s, the traffic, the street vendors and the noise: everything that makes me look back at my time there with a lot of nostalgia. My first friends were made there; I went to the most amazing school there. I fondly remember playing football there. I learnt to laugh, I learnt to cry, I learnt teamwork in small simple ways.

My love for food grew day by day! You could say that I have a huge appetite for the good stuff (by which I mean food). The rolls; the puchkas; the traditional sweets that melted in your mouth: all in a day’s work I should say! The sights and sounds of a vibrant city that made me stop and stare.  The city in which I grew up. A city in while I made mistakes, that reminded me that I was but a human! A city in which I made new friends every year.

You could imagine what it felt like to browse Google maps and locate my house on it and shout everyone in the room, “That’s my house!” Wouldn’t that be wonderful? I can say it was because I’ve experienced it. What annoys me though is the fact that I won’t be able to return to Calcutta over the Christmas break. Holidays are insufficient but my heart will always be there. It’ll be there every single minute of the Christmas season. I can imagine Nahoum’s packed to maximum capacity and the obnoxiously scary Santa Claus figures that are on sale in New Market. It’s a pity mom and dad, I won’t be home for Christmas.

Time has passed no doubt. Bengal sadly isn’t the state it used to be. They may have changed the name of the city to Kolkata. That won’t affect me. They may want to rename the state to a word I shall now name. That too won’t affect me. The government might have changed after a fairly large number of years. That won’t affect me either. I know one thing and I know it quite well:

“I’ll be a Calcutta boy for life...”

Photo Credit: Ofelia Kaisar: https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/s720x720/311371_293969880634793_100000653510184_963136_2034834387_n.jpg

Video Credit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9LBHwlAeOU

Inglourious Basterds...

\m/ (-.-) \m/

NOTE: I do not mean to offend anyone by compiling this. If you think you will feel offended, DO NOT READ FURTHER! Don’t say, I didn’t warn you! I did. This sentence is proof that I did warn you. Okay? It better be okay! Else I’ll be really mad with you and I don’t know what I’d do as a result. Maybe nothing, because that is what I do best! In no way do I mean to offend you or your credentials and if you feel I did then laugh at it, for laughing at yourself is best laughter there is. True Story! I laugh at myself and my stupidity every single day.

            AAMIR LOKHANDWALA: You know I have nothing much to say here. Aamir was a great guy, nay he still is a great guy I’m sure. Student Council amongst many other things, he was classic. The ‘Stick Basterd’, council good guy when needed and quite the opposite otherwise

 AAYUSH AGARWAL:  “Julie. Julie. Julie went the whole class, Julie sang the whole class.” Yes, we called him Julie, for reasons I hope you know why. If you don’t then I would suggest you look elsewhere but it sure won’t come out of me, Lover of math amongst other hard science related things, he’s our ‘Julie Basterd.’

ALEKHYA MAZUMDAR: Another Liverpool fan bites the dust. The ‘Skinny Basterd’ is a pretty decent centre-back on the football field. He loves to knock people up on the football field (not what you’re thinking pervert!!) He’ll target you’re shins and then attack them. Forget football, he is DBPC’s best shin-baller. “Ale NOOOOOO"

 AMAN DUTTA: From the corridors of Don Bosco to the streets of Sheffield, he remains the classic beat boxer of the section. Loud rambling beats during the most unnecessary moments kept us all pumped up till the last day of class. His facebook profile picture at the time of writing resembled an apple with a pair of headphones in it so music remains his calling: I give you the ‘Beat Boxing Basterd.’

ANUBRATA BHATTACHARYA: Always a quiet guy in class, possibly the quietest in most circumstances. Never hesitated to do that ounce of Kao when presented the chance though, for a (serious) lack of creativity, he’s our ‘Anu Basterd.’ Pun not intended you sicko!

       ARCHISMAAN GHOSH: Bama, O-Bama, Not Barack if you were thinking, but Archie was right up there with the best. Stupidity and lameness was one of his talents but then again when you compare him to the average student in class, he wasn’t very different from us all. I guess he’s our ‘Bama Basterd’ for lack of creativity flowing though me at this moment. Dare I say it, I love the email address he gave us all!

       ARITRA CHAKRAVORTY: “I’m glad you’re surname isn’t spelt the way mine is”, these were words of the wisest teacher to ever teach us in our final years of school. Last time I checked he was cursing his daily routine every single moment of his day. Our very own ‘Chorbi Basterd’ was unique; then again we were all unique which is what made us a crazy lot.

       ARITRA DAS: Another Aritra, but not a doppelganger by any means. This guy was full of Kaeth. as we put it here in school. No the full stop in the previous sentence isn’t out of place, it’s supposed to be there and will always be. Kaeth. You bet! Sandwich lover of great proportions, he’s our “Airy Basterd!” Not for reasons of air, but just because he is.

       ARKAPRABHA CHAKRABORTY:  Weird and amazingly stupid, the ‘perverted basterd’ as he is called is truly one of a kind. Good in spelling and quizzing, I wonder whether he has ever won a quiz on spelling or a spelling bee contest on quizzing? This guy is an amazing basterd and was one of the founders of HFL. Truly, an amazing hairy addition to the clan of basterds.

       AVIK DEBNATH: The ‘Nepali Basterd’, you know why! That’s about all I really need to say. Oh, I could also mention the crazy and totally needless MJ antics he put on time and time again. Nepali sure made us laugh every single time he did something unnecessary which is wy he finds a place amongst the elite basterds.

       AYUSH KANODIA: “Thollium” was discovered not by famous scientists but by students in Don Bosco, Park Circus. We still haven’t received our Nobel Prize though and that’s why we’re all mad right now. Math lover extraordinaire, All India IIT rank of 75 put him way out of our league as students but still in the mix as a basterd. I give you the ‘Thollium Basterd.’

       BINAYAK CHANDRA: “Etai Jibon” is what he wrote in my yearbook. I guess that speaks volumes about his laziness. I’m not judging, we all were lazy which is why we were a unified class. I’d shudder to ask why his nickname was Khalnayak, but that’s the basterd he is, he’s our ‘Khalnayak Basterd.’

       DARPAN SANGHAVI: Another math lover. Don’t they ever end? Don’t bother answering that question though. Darpan famously used to call some of us idiots and do math in a minute (M&M: get the pun?) “Have you used it?” were his famous words to a teacher which left us all laughing at the top of our lungs. I give you the ‘Math Basterd.’

      DEBARPAN GHOSH: Debu Da, the guy with all the loot. A regular actor in school plays, usually as a teacher or a morally good person, which he definitely isn’t in real life (citation required.) An avid Arsenal fan and canteen food lover, Debarpan is the ‘Acting Basterd’ so named because of his roles. Watch out Ekta Kapoor...

       DIPANJAN SENGUPTA: Another actor, famously playing a blind maoist! I mean seriously? Blind? We called him “Pawrooti” because of the contents of his lunch box, hence christened the ‘Pawrooti Basterd.’

      FRANCISCO MENDES: Arguably the biggest of the basterds, Shorty Mendez could probably be considered as head of the basterd. Young, black and an avid basketball fan, Francisco never misses the chance to make fun of anyone-whether you’re his friend or even a family member. The ‘Black Basketball Basterd’ as he is proudly called is truly an Inglorious Basterd…

      KAUSTAV SAHA: How many of you’ll have tried to act drunk when you’ll weren’t actually drunk? This guy was unique; he was drunk all the time. How he got his supply in school will go down as a mystery, one that baffled us all. Our very own ‘Bewra Basterd’, drunk and proud!

       KIRIT SANKAR GUPTA: CPU’s a speciality; it even fetched him a page long remark that cost the librarian a refill. Lover of the low blow, those that felt his shot will know what I mean. Fortunately, I never felt it so I’m safe. Huge shoe wearer, and for lack of a better name, he’s our “Ball Basterd.”

       KRISHNA AGARWAL: One of the saner basterds, Babumoshai as we called him at times was still a basterd at heart, even if he never really showed it. Perennial good boy of great repertoire, he’s our ‘Bhalo Basterd.’

      MAYANK BAHETY: Another basterd, number twenty on the list here, so we’re around the midway mark now. I should seriously stop trolling here. Mayank was another math lover and he usually got his work all correct, which is something I never quite figured out. Yet, we love him and consider him to be our ‘Mankey Basterd.’ Why the pokemon reference? I do not know!

      MUSTAFA RANGOONWALA: Every class needs a good class monitor and “Musti” exceeded all expectations. We were never ever shy to tell everyone why we made him monitor. Of course you need someone who you can twist around your finger, yet Mustafa did a great job! That’s what makes him a proud member of this list, our ‘Basterd-In-Charge.’

      NIKHIL SASIDHARAN: “Mend me, thou saucy fellow!”Famous Shakespearean words that we’ll always remember forever. “Saucy” was a sly fellow. Great on the football pitch, he called himself Xavi (or was it Iniesta, I don’t recall) Our ‘Saucy Basterd’ was a classic example of living live one sauce at a time.

       NISHANT RATERIA: Another math lover! Sigh, I’m so sick of the word already! He was also good at chemistry and yet he found time to do stupidity as well, even if it was on a minute scale. Proud member of the basterds, he’s our ‘Keo Karpin Basterd!’

      PRAVJYOT SINGH RAHI: Pravjyot was DBPC’s one and only YCS vice president in class XI. Yes that’s right YCS vice president. The first one who actually did no work. The ‘Religious Or Otherwise Basterd’, if given a chance would be the first person to leave the YCS (after Francisco and me that is.) He was on his way to become YCS’ first useless president but fell short proving his gross uselessness!

      RHYTHM DAS RAY: Bebe! Not the Man Utd player, that guy is way better that Rhythm. I must say I love the name, it’s unique and its rare, which is what I can’t say about his size. Our ‘Bebe Basterd’ loved to not pass the football time and time again and it often drove us crazy! Bebe, next time pass okay! Then we’ll love you more!

      RIKARNOB BHATTACHARYA: “Car knob” in case youre wondering how to pronounce his name, Riko is another gem to the family of basterds. The ‘Car Knob Basterd’ always seemed to know his way around the question paper which left me and others staring blankly. How he did it? I wish I knew, but one thing is for sure: Basterd never dies!

       SAMPRAS SAHA: He once famously claimed he’d turn you radioactive if you annoy him. And annoy him we did. Whether we are radioactive or not is for the government to decide. The ‘Chyawanprash Basterd’ was famous for being the reason I conceded the number of goals I did on the final year of school. If own goals were counted, he’d be topping the charts easily. Radioactive? Perhaps!

      SANNIDHYA GHOSH: Ah! The beat boxing maestro. If Aman was a hit outside the class, this guy was the hit inside the classroom. In the middle of the class, the thumping sounds that only we seemed to hear for some reason were funny and lively. Whether we’d have survived without his tunes? No one will know! Thank you O ‘Sunny Basterd!’

      SHAMBO BISHNU: Who is the only guy to get in trouble at school while sitting at home? That’s right, it’s this guy! Not once, but twice that too. Samba was his alter ego he got a few years ago and its one we loved until he got an even better name. The ‘Zambo Basterd’ was a biology student who spent more time in the computer lab that a computer student. Kudos you worthless punk!

       SHOUVIK CHATTERJEE: Metal head extraordinaire. The ‘Metal Basterd’ is the founder of Kaeth. Give him a hand for his invention; it even has a page on facebook that’s popular. So popular that it’s Kaeth. Give him a hand, for it could be his one great gift to humankind. Spread and spread alike, for Kaeth. is the future!

       SNEHAJYOTI SAHA: Three girls in class? You wish! A basterd of the highest order, he was another nut job on the loose. For lack of creativity, he’s the ‘Sneha-Neha-Jyoti Basterd!’ You already know the reason why! He played a mean Indian instrument whose name I can’t seem to recall at this moment, but it was big and was definitely not a sitar!

      SNEHAL DE: Harami! Just like us all. Victim of many jokes for reasons of his prominence. No, I do not mean the word in its actual meaning here but I suppose you get the drift! The ‘Billie Basterd’, son of our class teacher and classical singer who we all expected to win but he rarely did! No point in trolling on the subject I expect!

      SOHAM MAJUMDAR: Soham Majumdar is a singer par excellence. He has been around since God knows when. Another regular feature in school plays- usually as a drunkard or a mad-man or a mixture of both. Soham is the only basterd with two names- the ‘Drunk Basterd’ and the ‘Mad Basterd’. Dual nature at its best. “I am tension!”

       SOUMYAJIT PAL: Good guy of the highest nature. Of late he’s showing true colours which do not make him any less of a good boy! A huge Oranje fan he always was a Mr. Nice Guy, which is why he’s the ‘Nice Basterd.’  “Awesome sala” is the word of the day! Peace!

      SRIIJAN BANERJEE: The ’Chicken Basterd’ famously called Charles Dickens Charles Chickens” and the name stuck. This guy can be very desperate at times and claims to waste a lot of time on his PS2. At times he gets so desperate to fly: like the time when he scaled the school wall but fell flat on his back. Let’s hope no eggs broke! I want my breakfast!

      SUBHAJIT MUKHERJEE: Before proceeding any further, take a moment to pause and reflect of the Kaorami of this basterd. It was so vast and profound; it will never be repeated again. “Ma’am you’re a liar!” classic lines of a truly great basterd. The ‘KC Basterd’ will always be. Forever and ever. Till the world doth end. Amen!

       SUCHITRO BASU: ‘Bobby.’ End of discussion.

      TAMOJIT BOSE: Every monitor needs an able assistant and Tamo was quite the able assistant. Equally twistable and loved, he and Mustafa made quite the dynamic duo. I still remember the advice he gave me in my yearbook and haven’t taken it to heart just yet. If “Pinki From Chinki” is the way he’s called in our yearbook, then the ‘Pinki From Chinki Basterd’ he shall be!

      TANUMOY MAJUMDER: Another able KC aspirant. The Speedy Gonzalez of our class. He even had the audacity to do stupidity in the middle of the sports day race and still place first. Notable moments include screaming at the top of his lungs after clinching the relay gold medal. Truly a Japanese specimen, the ‘Japan Basterd’, now a math teacher!

      VICTOR MARIO KAISAR: Had the lack to compile this. The ‘Basterd Finding Basterd.’ The rest is for you to fill up.

      VIVEK GHOSH: Vivek and math are like two best friends. He loves math and will probably marry a math book, the tougher the better. The ‘Gambling Basterd’ earned his name after a famous publicity stunt. It is best I keep the outcome of the stunt to myself because I do not want to be attacked by math problems.

I sit back and fondly remember those brilliant years of high school every single day. Memories don’t come any better than those.

“Those were the days my friend,

We thought they’d never end!”

Cheers to all you basterds!

Photo Credit: http://inglourious-basterds.net/wp-content/themes/yabloggy/images/logo.png

Dreams Do Come True...

TD Waterhouse Stadium, London

I have no real words to describe what going live on public radio for the first time is. It was exhilarating to say the very least. Going live on public radio covering sports is one of the reasons why I moved from India to Canada.
The game here is the 2011 Senior High School Football Championships between Lucas Vikings and St. Thomas Aquinas Flames, from the TD Waterhouse Stadium in London, Ontario.
I'd say Spencer my co-host was a natural, I was stuttering but we're all learning. And the ending to the show is just classic.
Hope you enjoy it.
Cheerio

Photo Credit: http://jessicaparry.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/td-track1.jpg

Memoirs Of A Science Student...

XIIA. Legends Are Made Here...

XIA and XIIA will always remain special to me. Not for the math or the physics that we were taught but for everything else that transpired behind the doors of that hallowed classroom.

The fact that we had ‘Bewra’ who was always drunk! 

KC and group, need WE say more? Up Franco, Tanumoy, Aman, and the man, Subhajit!

Mr. Raghunath who got an ink stain from “the physics lab”

Me to Mr. Raghunath: “Sir I don’t follow. Explain."

Mr. Raghunath: "Come here and look and the tree."

Me: "Sir, White Flowers?"

Mr. Raghunath: "yes, now you know the answer go back!"

*Mr. Sumit walks into class with pre board papers.*

Me: "Sir, Have I passed finally?"

Mr. Sumit: "I’ll tell you soon. Sit."

Me:"No sir. NOW!"

Mr. Sumit: "You passed"

Me: "Finally..."

Mrs. Dhar (To Aamir and Me):  "Welcome to class. Staying for long?"

Mrs. Dhar: "Class revision. Pick any topic from the book I’ll give you a question"

(The usual statics, electricity, heat and gyan comes out)

Mrs. Dhar: "Victor your turn to pick."

Me: "Ma’am, logic gates"

Soham (After 5 seconds):" Hahahaha"

Class: "Sir, why do you crack PJ’s?"

Mr. Sanchayan: "I crack Pj’s because I can’t afford Rj’s"

Mr. Sanchayan (Exasperatedly to the class):  "How much more time till the period ends?"

Mr. Banerjee: "Every religion has a dark side."

Overheard: "Ours is the church!"

Mrs. "Shaw: Victor and Francisco, kitaab laya?"

Us: "No ma’am."

Mrs. Shaw: "Very good!"

*So Arka was scratching his hairy legs in class. and Mrs. Chatterjee sees him*

Mrs. Chatterjee: "What are you DOING??"

Arka: “Ma’am scratching.”

Rhythm goes to the library before Bosco Fest to bunk class! Mrs. Acharyya (Who happens to teach the commerce section) scolds him!

Arka happened to bunk as well. He walks up to her

Arka: “Ma'am. I have a debating audition to go to”and Walks out scot free."

Random People: "What did you just say Ale?"

Ale: “Ehhhhhhh. Bhuley gechi.”

Anna (At the canteen seeing Debarpan, Arka or Me): “Gerabee? Gerabee?”

Soham:”I was taeling...."

”Mr. Sumit (To Arka): “Yeah what's going on there?”

Me: “Sir he's gay!”

Mr. Sumit (To Arka): “Yeah, then come over here."

”Mrs. Dhar: “If you are not busy you are dizzy!"

”Science exhibition *our project FAIL*

Arka: “Dara. Shombhu chemical pump shikhiye chilo.”

Debarpan: "Tai lagabo.”

Me: What?

Debarpan:  “Shombhu class six-e chemical pump shikhiyechilo, retard.”

*At the Science Exhibition*

Siddhant Kanaujia spews out loads of scientific shit about how his project is a non-Newtonian fluid.

*Debarpan glares*

Siddhant: “Actually it’s all crap. It’s just water and cornflour.”

Soham: “Victor! Khabar achey?”

(He was holding my empty tiffin box)

*So we were playing football in class. Mr. Bhual is seen in the corridor*

Vivek: “Bhual aasche”

(Class settles down)

Mr. Bhual (Enters the class and approaches Vivek): “Vivek, vernacular-ey kotha bolish na.”

Alekhya (To almost anything): “This fat, this long.”

There’s a long line of people in the canteen. “Anna roll, Anna chow”

.Debarpan and Me (Daily): Pick up rolls and chow without telling Anna.

Debarpan (To everything): “Kelabo toke...”

So the class is sitting quietly with no noise being made. And suddenly in a loud voice: “CHICKEN!”

*Every week before chemistry practical*

Random person: "Labcoat? labcoat?Jonathan Da Labcoat?"

Jonathan: "This is not a shop!"

Karen (To Jonathan): "You and Jaya keep the lab files so untidily. Look at me and “hole-hole” how neat our lab is!"

*Before ISC Chemistry practical exams began*

Jonathan: *mumbles answers and leaves*

During the Computer Practical 1st term exam the LAN was on and programs were emailed to one another.

During the 2nd term, the LAN was put off, and out came the pen drives.

Technology rules...

*Arka was poking wire into Tanumoy's butt*

Karen: "While you're doing your experiment, he's doing his experiments!"

*Kirit was showing us his page long general remark which faded towards the end*

"Kirit: Cicely's pen ran out in the middle of writing it."

Darpan (slapping someone’s head): "Idiot!"

*And then he finishes a math problem we've been staring at all period in 2 minutes.*

SJV: “I won't tell you where to get pornography. You know that better than I do.”

SJV: “So, last week we were Doing women...”


*Okay, so we were having yet another 'Value Education' class in school*
SJV: Let me tell you a story about three young men who left home for the first time. On the train they were exclaiming: Beef khaben, Modh khaben, Cigarette khaben!"

Mrs. Jayaraman: "I hear a phone ringing! Where izz Zambo Biznu??"

Class: "Ma'am, he's absent!"

In the chemistry lab, Mrs. Jayaraman: "Kaustav Saha and Zambo Biznu, stop talking and do your work."

Class: Ma'am, they BOTH are absent!

Mr. Raghunath: “Hot man?"

Okay so we were waiting in class for our EVE projects.

Shovic's elbow touches his phone and it plays some lame Bollywood song.

Mrs. Chatterjee is alarmed and cries out “What is that?”

Shovic: “ONE TOUCH WIRELESS FM”

And he was suspended!

But he still gets a text out to his girlfriend from Kirit’s phone!

Mr. Raghunath kept talking crap in class one day.

Class: “Sir, Power shoe?”

Mr. Raghunath: “Power shoo!”

If you ever wanted to see a Chicken fight with a chair, Chicky vs Snehajyoti was a sight to marvel at!

Alekhya:  "Don't talk behind my back!!!"

Pravjyot: "But I’m not sitting behind you.."

JP: You boys are here in this world "DUE TO THE BEAUTIFUL UNION OF TWO HUMAN BEINGS"

(Pauses)

 And then adds, "I suppose so"

Pravjyot: "I don't watch porn, I do porn."

There was a ruckus in the computer lab and someone sees SJV walking into the corridor.

He starts shouting "SIBY SIBY SIBY "

SJV hears the voice and comes into the lab screaming “who was shouting Siby Siby SIby? When your dad comes, do you’ll shout “MUKUL MUKUL MUKUL?”

So one day, Chorbi, Pravjyot and Shovic are checking out *ahem* hot moms.

And then spot one, and Chorbi goes, "MILF!! MILF!!" and Shovic joins him.

Two minutes later, they ask Pravjyot if he knows the full form of MILF.

Pravjyot: "Yeah...duh..."

Shovic: "Ki bol toh"

Pravjyot: "My Friends Hot Mom, simple!!"

Mrs. Dhar (to Chorbi): you should use the golf gardens bus instead of public buses. There are lots of trees there which you can use them to show your friendship to girls. I've lived there for 20 years, and have seen many people!!

Darpan (Not knowing how loud he would be): "Have you used it?"

Sampras: "Amay ragash na! Ami Mahabharat korey phelbo!"

Unknown: “Keliye RADIOACTIVE kore debo!!”

Let me recall an event when Sannidhya was explaining Fraunhoffer's lines as directed by Mr. Raghunath.

Here's how Sunny began:Sunny: "Well... the sun consists of many elements, hydrogen, helium, sodium, potassium, THOLLIUM...etc"

Sunny and Francisco (before every exam): “CHUDE CHOMOTKAR!”

Subhajit: Aamar ma ke keno chudbi barra? Baari te maa bon nei?

Mendes: Tui Aamar ma ke keno chudbi bol toh?

Subhajit: Maa bon nei na, maha mushkil.

Mrs. Jayaraman: “Tomorrow is a Chemistry test.”

Subhajit: "Ma'am you’re a liar."

Mrs. Kutar: "What role do trees play in our life? "

*Subhajit shoots his hand up in the air.*

Mrs. Kutar: “Yes”

Subhajit:"Ma'am, an 'important' role."

Mrs. Kutar: "What is GOI?"

Subhajit: "It is 'goi.'"

During the Bengali class, Tanumoy was asked to read the text.

The text had a character called "Maggi."

He purposely mispronounces it as "Maagi."

*The whole class looks at him shocked. Arka, sitting in the first bench, looked at him like he just saw him drop dead.*

The best part was the teachers answer:  "Erom hotei paare."

Mr. Sanchayan: “Wait one minute then hit him. The bell will have rung by then.”

At the time we were having a lot of chaos with students bringing mobile phones to school.

So, Francisco, takes his keys, and under the table starts fiddling with it and starts acting all suspicious.

Mrs. Lingwood sees that, and comes running and asks him to turn out his pockets, which he promptly does, and ma'am only finds his keys.

She leaves utterly disappointed.

After that incident, Francisco puts a sign on his bag saying, "Cell phone here" on one compartment.

Mr. Chattoraj checks his bag, sees the sign and CHECKS ONLY THAT COMPARTMENT in a bag with over four other compartments!

*Vivek was attempting a bicycle kick.*

General statement: "There, he goes down!"

This isn’t 12A but Rajarshi was in the computer lab, watching funny football videos...

*Sir comes running and quietly stands behind him. *

*Rajarshi is in fits of laughter.*

*Sir quietly taps Rajarshi on his shoulder.*

Rajarshi, without looking back, says, "Dara na baara"

Mr. Raghunath:  “What men? …….My dear boys…… u belib me, all of u know physics” (He tried to say man but failed miserably)

Soham (on seeing Ayush complete the physics sums): “e ki re ami copy-i  korte parlam naa arr o beta hesh-o kore fello”

Rhythm (before entering the exam hall on the day of physics test):” Sunny, I need to pass man, please”

Saucy (before any test): “Bhai, don’t take stress and strain, Young’s modulus nikal jayega”

Francisco (before the second term exams in class XI):” Do you know the physics syllabus?”

Subhajit:“Amar naa kalke buke khub chest pain hochchilo”

Ayush (whenever he heard someone singing): “gana bandh kar yaar”

Sannidhya’s father (Science Exhibition Judge): What’s your name?

*silence for 3 seconds*

Sanni: Sir, My name is Sannidhya!!! I mean Sannidhya Kumar Ghosh.

Sanni (explaining the experiment): Sir according to the recent survey under taken by us.....

Judge: Ok Wait!!

*Aman  Immediately starts explaining the uses of our project though a slide show.*

Judge (to Aman): Wait! Explain me the circuit diagram to me

*SILENCE FOR 3 MINUTES*

Aman: Sir, these are wires, these are switches and there is a cell!

Judge: I mean the working of the circuit!

*SILENCE*

Aman : “Sir, I was given the responsibility of making the presentation and nothing more!"

Mustafa (making an announcement in class): "Guys I need to collect "money" for ....."

*A shoe is thrown at him by Tanumoy Majumder*

So Francisco had his shoes off in class one day.

Next thing he remembered, one shoe was in Srijan's guitar case, the other in the teacher's cupboard!

 "XIIA Forever"

Inputs by: Arka, Alekhya, Franco, Sannidhya, Archismaan, Kirit, Shambo, Aman, Chorbi, Shovic, Subhajit, Tanumoy, Soumyajit, Avik, Mustafa

Video Credit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfuzVU94vI4